HELLO GOODBYE! GOODBYE HELLO!

We say "goodbye" on many occasions, for different reasons, in particular seasons, to special persons and with unique emotions.  Graduations are scenarios where sad goodbyes dominate the air!


F. G. Calderon High School is my Alma Mater.  It used to be one of Arellano University's branches, which produced its first batch of graduates in 1952.  It only lived for  44 years, with its last batch  in 1996.  I was among the 1964 graduates.


There never was any alumni homecoming initiated by the school till in the eighties,  when  a group of Calderonians,  (that's how we call ourselves),  conceptualized and started one.  Prime movers were Melencio Santos, Rogelio Tupas, Dominador Badoria, Elias Trinidad and Ruben Sequitin, who now have their addresses in Heaven.  Together with them were spouses Harry and Tess Vitalli, Alexander Cabral and Josefino Elipse, who made possible the gathering at the Philippine Racing Club (PRC) Social Hall in March, 1987--which turned their sad graduation "goodbyes"  years back to sweet reunion "hellos.


Inspired by the success of the first get-together,  batches 1962, 1963, 1964 and 1965 made a second round of sweeter "hello's" in August of the same year at the school campus.  It was such a big accomplishment! Imagine, two meetings in a row within the same year! Yet sad to say, that  second just became its last! But not with a "group" which regularly met during birthdays yearly in February, May and July to nourish the renewed friendships.  Christmastime would also allow them to meet, eat and continue reminiscing high school days.  And one memorable day, moments were spent singing, eating, swimming and just chatting after touring the Clark Air Base where Edgar T. Elona from Batch 65 (a member of the "group") was then the Wing Commander and Mayor of the Air Force City.


Subsequent reunions were mostly called by the Arellano Univeristy Alumni Association for all colleges and high school branches where only very few Calderonians joined.  One was held in Club Filipino in 2002 where then Col. Edgar T. Elona (Batch '65) became one of the recipients of the MOST OUTSTANDING ALUMNI award.  That same night, Col. Elona, Remedios Gloria-Amurao and Romeo Yap, agreed to organize the F. G. Calderon Alumni Association under the guidance of two energetic faculty alumni:   Lorna Montalvo and Lumen Garvida-Cruz.  


With Edgar at the helm of the FGCHS Alumni Association, the first official homecoming was launched  at the A. Mabini High School on December 6, 2003.  Thereafter, regular reunions ensued,  with the ninth scheduled on December 10, 2011 at the Amnesiac Grill in Malate, Manila. 


Truly, sad "goodbyes are not forever.  And reunions are sweet "hellos" to  renew friendships and acquaintances.


And one sweet truth is this:  Even one life's goodbye would not mean an end to a relationship here on earth.  We all will be seeing each other after each one's goodbye,  where there will be no more tears nor pain but only eternal bliss in the presence of our God!.  And the  sweetest hellos will just be with our smiles for every soul reunited with the rest of God's family!


                               
                      Life is begun with  sweet hello
                      Until it's time for it to go
                      And when the Potter calls it a day
                      A sad goodbye will end the way.                      
  
                    "Goodbyes" are not  meant to be forever  
                      Though sadly it would seem they are
                      As thoughts of leaving continue to linger
                      Fear just won't be too far.
                                             
                      Yet there is hope in every ending
                      And perfect time for new beginning
                      God  knows the best of everything
                      And "Hellos" are joyfully waiting!
                    

                                  

To batch '64, see you on December 10!  


Here are some high school and reunion photos.  Just find yourself!

Ms. Cruz and Rosalinda Aquitania-Caoile  at its 2008 reunion

                                           First year section one class under Mr. Constantino

                                                                     Batch '64

                                                           Fourth Year Section One

                                          Logarta, Aquitania, Saludes, Viclar, Cayetano, Elipse, Samonte

                         Christening of Ador Badoria's child in 1988 at the St. Andrew's Church

                                                      Batches '63, '64 and 65' 

                                     Offshoot of the first and second reunions in 1987

            At the Clark Air Base, with our host, then  Wing Commander, Col Edgar T. Elona PAF

                                        Batches '63, '64 and '65 with high school teachers

                                   

                                                  Batch '64 at 2005 Reunion

And here are the latest photos taken on Feb. 25, 2012 when we treated treated our teachers to a lunch at Max's.  Just click once the photo for full screen.

                                                       Aquitania, Elona, Mojica and Cruz

                                         
                                           Find your face please....Click once for full screen.

                                     
                                         Below was taken last Jan 24, 2012 at Harry and Tess' place at
                                         BF Resort LPC.....a reunion after 4 years of absence of the Vitallis.
                                          

                                       
                              And here below is a remembrance of last Dec. 10, 2011 reunion at the Amnesiac Grill:

Below are shots taken during the internment of one of the prime movers of

reunions, Eleng Trinidad from Batch '64.

                                                Blessing the urn before the vault was closed.

From left:  Eleng's daughter Rosalie, Ms. Cruz, Rose, Eleng's daughter Natalie and Son-in-law. 

MAY ISANG PANGARAP

What is a dream?   Is it a glance at or a glimpse of the future?  Is it a false that could someday be true?  Could it be a long long journey thru space and time?  Or is it just a fantasy that will always stay behind.  Yet surely  it is  a seed to reality!  It's like a star that sometimes you don't see but it's there!  It could just be a place somewhere over the rainbow.  Yet sadly, it could just be carvings on the snow!    

When you dream alone, that dream stays on.  Yet when you dream together, you are living a dream!!  And the long wait could be over!

Our God first dreamed about us.  In fact, He has a special dream for each one of us.  But unlike our dreams, God's dream is a sure reality of what He has planned and hoped for long before we were conceived in our mother's womb.

And He has His dreams too for each family.  Do we have to let Him wait for too long to realize His dreams for us?   

              May isang pangarap

              Ang ating Panginoon

              Buhay na pangarap

              Noon hanggang ngayon

              Na sa bawat tahanan,

              Siya ang maghari at manahan

              Maging pagpapala

              Ng mga biyayang nakakamtan.

              May isang pangarap

              Na di magbabago

              Buhay na pangarap

              Para sa akin at sa “yo

              Na ang bawat puso

              Maging banal Niyang tahanan

              Daluyan ng pag-ibig

              At ligayang walang hanggan

             Maghari Ka, maghari Ka,

             Sa aming tahanan maghari Ka

             Maghari Ka, maghari Ka,

             Sa aming tahanan, maghari Ka.

Time is Spelled L O V E

We have long been planning to visit Boyet for a post-celebration of his 50th  birthday.  As his friends and co-teachers in SFU, we have always been privileged to be part of his birthday celebrations in the past and we thought this time, we would bring a simple party to his house.  Boyet stopped teaching due to health problems. Since then, our connections  have been thru FB messages and emails.   It was unfortunate our busy schedules this month thwarted our plan.  Yet finally, we agreed we'd make it this Friday, Oct. 21.   We'd go to his place, bring some food  and celebrate!  

Friday came.  All ready for the afternoon surprise for Boyet, we were shocked to receive a sad news in the morning.  It was Boyet who surprised us!   He went home to our Maker!  We felt bad.  We felt the pain of no longer seeing him with his smiles, not hearing his voice and jokes, not holding his warm hands anymore.  It was so sad we failed to show our love and concern at the moment when he needed it most.  Time flew.  I would say not too fast.  Yet, we cannot replay the scenes anymore to insert the scenarios we wanted.  They did not become part of Boyet's memories, nor ours.    


Yes, we regretted.  Yet we can only learn from what we missed doing.    Yes, time was over for us to show love in action.  We had all the time from October 9 to  20 but we just let those days passed.   And like in all sorts of regrets,  we could only say--"had we known . . . we could have . . ." 

Boyet enjoyed sharing anything.  He loved to treat friends and students.  He never missed an opportunity helping others.  And he was a good singer too!  And oh we enjoyed those happy videoke moments.  

Enjoy's God's presence forever, Boyet.  We'll miss you friend.  Thank you for all the love you shared with us  all these years. 

TIME IS SPELLED…..L O V E

  

Twenty four little hours make a day

Sixty rushing minutes make an hour

If love fills each empty space

The world becomes a better place.

But what is love without a time

To lend a hand or wear a smile

To wipe a tear and bring a cheer

To sing a song and drive a fear.

Time may be long, time may be short

Time may be spent, time may be lost

Time may be borrowed just for a day

Time may be yours to waste away.

Yet time is always at its best

When love is shared.

 Moments with our friend, Boyet.

ONE DAY

“One day” – two words that always set in motion our story telling at bedtime  to lull our kids to sleep.  Yet for dreamers like me, these little words could spell  big hope for a wish to become real someday.  But for prophets, “one day”  is a sure thing to happen at an appointed time in the near or far future. 

In a span of one’s lifetime, some episodes would mark occasional absences of joy, friendship and love.  Yet, even if “absence” is a lonely word, it no longer stays forever.  And one  day, somewhere, somehow, that long long silence  will be broken.  And absence will be no more.

Meeting old friends truly brings inexplicable joy!  And I thank the Lord for having allowed me to meet a friend one afternoon, after 43 years of absence.  That was a moment to remember!  The precious few hours spent eating and chatting created new friendship memories  that I'll forever treasure.

Yet there is one surest thing  to happen to each one of us one day.  Yes, we all will meet our Creator face to face!   And in His presence,  there'll be no more absence of love, joy and friendship.    You will be filled with the purest love and immeasurable joy!  And when that day comes, will you smile and run fast to His loving, waiting arms and feel the warmth of His embrace?

Life here on earth is but a journey

Where joys and tears cling in harmony

The busy clock ticks one by one

Till sun breaks through another dawn.

Living sometimes counts so many seasons

At times, just for a simple reason

Yet it’s not how long or short we’d stay

It’s how we live each special day.

Our Father sets all time and space

So let us run and win the race

One day when all is said and done

He’d sweetly call by name, each one. 

And on that day we all would smile

Like pretty rainbows in the sky

God’s promises are always sure

God’s perfect love will last and endure.

"One day" is such a lovely moment

It’s meeting Someone Who knew us for so long

It’s going back to where we belong

It’s being in a safe place called . . . "Our Home".

TAYONG DALAWA

Date  :  April 11, 1975 (the day before our wedding)

Time  :  2:00 p.m.

Place :  Our Lady of Sorrows Parish  in Pasay city

The Shocking News

We were finalizing the preparations for our wedding the next day when the Parish secretary broke a shocking news:  "Your wedding has been cancelled!"  The reason?  Ernie failed to submit his baptismal certificate!   Alarmed with the pronouncement, we pleaded and promised to complete the requirements after the wedding.  But the decision was final.  The secretary reiterated:  "There will be no wedding here tomorrow!"  

First and Second Miracles

We rushed to our Sts. Peter & Paul church in Makati and sought  the Parish Priest's  help.  And the first miracle happened.   Right there and then, Ernie was baptized!   The second?   "Tuloy ang kasal",   not in Pasay but in Makati!  Same day and hour as originally scheduled:  April 12, 1975 at 10:00 a.m. 

We saw how God moved that day.  I knew He did not allow us to exchange our vows in Pasay.   He wanted it   in our parish where Ernie and I would religiously hear mass on Sundays; and where in one little corner we would proceed after each mass to pray before  the Crucified Christ. 

Third and Fourth Miracles

We planned for  a very simple wedding.  For a modest church fee, we agreed on the  following arrangements:  There will be no mass  nor the usual paraphernalia (except the rings) during the ceremony.  Ernie and I  would just be flashing ourselves right  in front of the altar.    But to our surprise, the wedding march  played and I was asked to walk down the aisle.  So with my wondering smile, I  marched with my father escorting me, with only a pair of principal sponsors (Ninong Tony and Ninang Mary) making up my entourage.  And the third miracle happened!    There was a mass!  And the fourth?  The church was splendidly adorned  with beautiful flowers befitting a posh wedding!  The truth is, there was a 7:00 am classy wedding and the decorations were left there for us! 


A Comedy Skit
Unprepared for the big changes that day,  minor distractions ensued as the wedding rites were solemnized.  Since we did not have the paraphernalia like the arrhae, my brother did an emergency collection of 13 one-peso coins, while my auntie swiftly snatched the veil and cord from the parish cabinet.   Some officemates performed their unofficial duties as secondary sponsors:  lighting the candle, placing the veil and the cord.  It was just like a comedy skit on stage.  Oh  you should have seen  the big smiles on all faces.  


That was the Day
There will always be a time for everything.  After being childhood classmates and friends for 5 years, doing for him that bridging role for the apple of his eyes (1957-62), teen-age sweethearts for 7 months (January to August, 1962), mortal enemies and perfect strangers for 3 years (1962-65),  reconciled sweethearts  playing a "galit-bati" love relationship for 10 years (1965-75), Ernie and I finally agreed to spend the rest of our lives together with all our differences and imperfections.  We played major roles in one of God's vineyards as husband and wife, father and mother, building a family, a little church.  We enjoyed the romantic stage of married life, passed the most difficult tests during the disillusionment stage, finally enjoying the joy stage, serving God as workers of the Wedded Hearts for Jesus ministry.  


Two in One
God has perfectly chosen two imperfect souls as partners to build one lasting and fruitful relationship.  He brought together two strangers to accomplish one sacred mission.   In the process, He has equipped each marriage with all the gifts and the graces to withstand life's hurricanes and earthquakes.    And marriage is a commitment.  God, who is the author of marriage will always play His role  as the only Third Party Who will truly make it work.  And remember:  God did not make a mistake in His pairing process.  You were MFEO (Meant For Each Other)!  


Yet we still could have another mission.  We could be a couple for others and be part of God's business!   Look! The harvest is plenty but the workers are few.  Are you ready to heed God's call?  Do you want to be a blessing to others? 

Ikaw at ako’y magkaibang-magkaiba

Pinili na Niya di pa man nagkikita

Sa dinami-rami ng  tao sa mundo

Kanyang pinag-isa, puso mo’t puso ko.

Di man laging kulay rosas itong ating mundo

Di pa Siya nagkulang, at hindi magbabago

Siya’y may kasagutan sa bawat suliranin

Kanyang tinutugon ang bawat dalangin.

Napakaganda ng  pangarap Niya

Sa iyo, sa akin, sa ating dalawa.

Tunay na  pag-ibig na ating nadama

Ating  ipabatid, ibahagi sa iba.

Ikaw at ako,  nais Niya,  tayong dal’wa

Maging pagpapala sa bawat  pamilya

Maging katugunan, kasangga’t kaagapay

Habang mayro’ng  lakas, habang may buhay.

Here's Ernie and Rose spending life together for 33 years with all its complexities till 
Sept. 16, 2008 when Ernie went back home.

Let me share also Bob Braun's all-time-favorite.  It's all about our vows. 

  




      

     

TWO BEAUTIFUL HANDS

"Do you know why God created gaps between fingers?        So that someone who is special to you,         Comes and fills those gaps by holding your hands forever." Beautiful!  Even if we  know that holding hands forever is physically impossible!  Maybe a moment could just be enough to accomplish God's purpose.  I love these lines forwarded by a friend, whose friend has sent it, and whose friend has received and sent it, and so on and so forth.  What a long list of senders and receivers of quotes and nuggets of wisdom to lighten and brighten up our world!  And technology has been playing its part so well in the delivery process.   The message is perfectly loud and clear.  God purposely made gaps between fingers of our hand:    first,  for someone to fill those gaps; second, for someone to feel the warmth; third, for two distant hands to reach and meet;  fourth, for many hands to join and hold on.    When God created His masterpiece, He did'nt want him to be alone.  So He made a partner whose hand he could  hold as they  walked on, inside and outside of paradise!   Shall we raise our hands as we sing this unforgettable sonata?  "I have two hands, the left and the right, hold them up high so clean and bright!"  Oh thank God, we've got two beautiful hands.   Yet there may be some who may just have one,  or none at all.  Now, look closely at your hands.  Fill those gaps.  Feel the warmth?  Yes, our hands are filled with energy,  full of feelings!  As if the heart is there on each palm.   And look!  Each palm is covered with smoother skin, so delicate and soft,  very sensitive to release and catch emotions.   A hand's gentle touch could bring comfort, healing, blessing and love.  A friendly handshake brings joy and peace.  And like a compass, one hand could follow silent directions leading to its destination.  Watch a blind man walk and cross the streets holding on to only a piece of wood as his guide!   Hands can  multi-task!  Watch a beggar begging with his left hand, while his right dirty hand enjoys left-over burgers.  Switch on your TV, with your left hand on the remote control, and your right on the cellphone!    And yes, we've got  powerful hands!  They can make and destroy.  So many hands of slaves built the palaces and towers of kings.  Yet with the fierce hands of the enemies, they were torn down to rubbles!    Hands can invent and copy.  They can draw and write lines, notes and maps.  A painter's hand could write a book with each flawless stroke on canvas!  And even cute hands can make lifeless instruments create  wonderful sounds to  play romantic tunes!  Oh you can name so many things that our hands can do.   Why do we have such beautiful and powerful hands?  Because the Hands that made them have rightfully positioned the ten little fingers for greater works!  Why?  So His Hands could  work thru them to accomplish His purpose!  Well it's just too sad that no matter how gracious God is in equipping us with two mighty hands, we still fail to live life victoriously.   We ignore opportunities that we sometimes fail and fall.  We become blind!  We refuse to use the gifts.  We let go the miracles that our hands and  His hands could together create -- in our lives and in the lives of those around us!     Now, look at your hands once more.  Are they willing to fill the gaps in someone else's hands?  There may be lonely people near you needing their warmth.   See those smiling faces from a distance?   They may just be yearning for comfort and love.  Look a little farther.  Can you see those old and dirty faces dreaming to live better lives?  Oh your hands may just be the generous hands that will make them smile!   Take good care of your hands.  They can work miracles!  They can give love, not only on Christmas day!  And they can pray.    Two Hands that built the world Were the Hands that made you The Hands that carried the cross Were the Hands that saved you And the Hands that fed the hungry Healed the sick, cheered the lonely Were the Hands of a Carpenter from Galilee. And His Hands could be your hands rowing the boat Yes His Hands could be your hands guiding the lost Oh your hands could hold the hands of a lonely broken heart To fill the gaps, to give the warmth. Your gentle hands can wipe the tears in someone's eyes And paint some pretty colored rainbows in the skies Your little hands could write a song to fill the air And build a world of cheer, of love and care. Your hands are lovely, they can pray a simple pray'r Your hands are precious, they can share a thousand cares Your hands give power in the Name of the Lord Your hands bring life, in the presence of God! Caring hands that could make all dreams come true Strong mighty hands that could re-create anew They are the POTTER'S Hands  Working thru YOUR hands.

SALAMAT SA IYO, AMA

Here's a cute story of "How the Rose was Won"!


May 16, 1988
It was lunch break.     I came from a meeting and was heading back to work when I was halted by an ongoing activity at the open space fronting our office.  It was a "Life in the Spirit" seminar.  I decided to wait till the speaker finished her talk.  I saw that most of the participants were our NASECO service employees.  I was impressed by the eloquence of the speaker. She was talking about God's love.   But as she continued, the message became so powerful that I felt something different  going on inside my heart.  Then she sang a beautiful song.  She shed tears and I couldn't help letting mine flow.  There was conviction deep within me.   I became so ashamed of myself.  Yet there was such an awesome feeling of being comforted and loved!  When she asked the audience to raise their hands in prayer,  I slowly raised mine, shyly and not too high.  And with my hands raised, eyes closed, lips whispering a prayer, I surrendered my life to God!  The first session saw me stucked to my seat, thirsting for more.  It was a week-long, noon-time seminar.  And you know what?  I was always present even without anyone inviting nor reminding me.   Oh yes, finally, the  "Hide and Seek" was over.  Now it was Jesus Himself that I heard calling my name.    I heeded the call.  That simple encounter started it all.  And that is how the Rose was won!   That also gave birth to this song, Rosalinda's very first lines:  "Salamat sa 'Yo, Ama".  And the lines continue to flow from my heart.  


Life was still the same after that encounter.   But living it became totally different!  

I want to thank God for not giving up on me.  Thank you, dear Father for Your love.  

Sino ako, kung wala ka,

Sino ako kung mag-iisa

Ako’y lupa lamang, binigyan Mo ng buhay

Winangis sa Iyong kaanyuan....

Sino ba akong dapat Mong mahalin

Sino ba akong binigyan Mo ng pansin

Ako’y makasalanan, nabuhay sa dilim

Minahal Mo’t tunay na inangkin....

O may pag-ibig pa kayang 

Hihigit sa pag-ibig Mo

May pag-ibig pa kayang

Tulad ng sa ‘YO

Wala na nga, wala na nga,

O Diyos, Ika’y dakila

Salamat sa Iyo...salamat sa Iyo

Salamat sa Iyo, Ama...

OUR GOD OF NEW THINGS

I attended a debut last Friday night and I was amazed to see the traditional 18 Candles and Roses ceremonies differently but creatively performed.  Instead of giving simple birthday wishes while lighting their candles, the eighteen girlfriends romped on stage with their beautiful gowns.  And to my surprise, the eighteen guys did not waltz with the lady when each gave his rose.  Each danced difficult modern steps for the debutante to follow!  And you could see the fun on all faces as cameras clicked from the audience' seats.  And it was good!


Then I began recalling some cute scenarios, comparing the old with the  new ways of doing things:

• THEN, in college, we would copy the lengthy lecture of our professor as he would write them down on two big blackboards.  Then we would start covering our eyes and nose to screen the  chalk mess when  a student erases the board for a second round of handwritten lecture.  Then...k r i i n n g g!! End of class session!  NOW, as a lecturer myself, my lesson would be flashed on white board from a computer installed in the room.  The students would  have their laptops on their desks to take down additional notes during  discussions.  Oh yes, same lessons but with new methodology.  That's time-saving!
• THEN, love letters sent thru the mails would reach their destination at a time when both the man and the woman would have found new "apples of their eyes"!  NOW, your thoughts and feelings could be delivered right at the moment you want to release them.  And then again delivered at the moment when they're gone! Same feelings yet easier way now to let go and get back!  That's magic!
• THEN, the Wedded Hearts couple ministry used to conduct a marriage renewal seminar for 2 1/2 days.  NOW, a seminar is completed within a day and a half for a regular MR and just a day for a special.  And that's counting only 15 years from it's birth in 1996.  That's cost-cutting!

and many many more.  Technology has made it so easy for man to do research and  accomplish things. Solutions are on the tip of his fingers.  Economy on the other hand, pushed man to gain more with lesser resources.   So, old systems and programs are regularly evaluated, re-designed and enhanced for better and more effective results.  Yet despite the new things that are available to deliver whatever you wish to deliver, the old could still block and pull down the score.  And same holds true in our spiritual journey.  Spiritual Maturity seems to be far from being reached with the old self hanging around to  drag and keep itself away from what God has really meant it to be.  Old sins renewed, failures magnified, forgiveness denied, joys delayed, dreams lost, hope gone, love refused and many more on and off  irritants that destroy, continue to haunt and linger.  Oftentimes, they reign and win!

Our God is a "God of New Things".  He fills our lives with big and small surprises.  He gives new hope.  He dreams new dreams;  all rooted from the passion of His great love for each one of us.  It's the same love that made Him create the world.  The same love that made Him send His Son to live with us to understand us better.  The same love that saves and redeems us.  The same love that holds eternity safe for us; that we may all be with Him.  The same love that creates and re-creates us; to be transformed and become new each day!  Yes, our God is a God of new and better things.  And He makes all things beautiful!  

     From nowhere, He packed the heavens

     From nothing, He built a world

     And from the dust, He formed His masterpiece

     To fill the earth with lasting peace.

     His creation, tempted and fallen

     Paradise lost, so quickly stolen

     But in His mercy, sent forth a Savior

     New dreams, new hopes, salvation for the lost.

     Our God is a God of mercy and love

     Our destiny He holds so dear

     As we journey thru, He’ll surely bring

     Bigger and better and greater things!  

     Let’s join our hands and sing praises together

     As we enjoy His presence forever

     Lift up our hearts and minds and souls to Him

     The Giver of blessings, our God of new things!


I am not finished yet with the melody.  Let me share this beautiful song  from Steve Curtis Chapman, "God Makes All Things New".

     

GOD IS REAL, NO MATTER HOW YOU FEEL

Famine, riots, recession, floods, earthquakes, wars, freak accidents, break-ups and corruption are now regular features in our morning dailies.  What is surprising is that they don't shock anymore!  They  become routine.  Just like four seasons, each episode goes thru the cycle, one after the other, from generation to generation.  The worst scenario in a decade may have been forgotten.  Yet a mark remains that connects the present to its past.   And life goes on, the victims damaged and torn to pieces.  Just like Humpty Dumpty who sat on a wall, each had a great fall! I was not spared of great falls. Sometimes they came in pairs.  Let me just highlight a pair.  And these were the lighter falls:

• When PNB and its congenerics were privatized 1n 1991, I was forced to retire from government service.  We bought an AUV from my separation pay to help sustain our growing family needs. In one of its provincial trips via the north expressway,  the van overturned when one of its wheels loosed fit and pitched itself away from the van!  It was a second-hand unit and insurance just covered minimal costs of repair.  One passenger sustained injuries that required clutches for years for a damaged leg.  With the initial loss on the van operations,  I wondered whether we had  chosen the right business or not.  I was thankful still cause Ernie was unharmed.
• We were just recuperating from cash shortfalls when one day while cleaning the van, Ernie showed signs of pain on his chest.  We brought him to the hospital where he was rushed to the ICU.  He had a heart  attack and they called it myocardial infarction.  They said it could have been fatal had we been delayed for a few minutes.  Thank God Ernie survived.  But there were so many "don't's". That meant lots of adjustments in everything.  We did cost cutting on some budgets to allow more on priorities like medicines.  That also meant more ways to earn. Sacrifices were made.  We could no longer afford private schools for all my children so the rest were transferred to public schools.    

With God's grace, I passed the tests.  There were all sorts of  healing:  physical, emotional, relational and spiritual. His grace was more than sufficient to bring back together the broken pieces. My faith grew as God showed me He was in full control all the time.  With all my tears,  I knew God was so near that  I could still smile.  Yes, GOD IS REAL, NO MATTER HOW YOU FEEL!!




Never mind all the troubles around you

Just wear a smile when your eyes are in tears

Just remember God is always beside you

God is real….no matter how you feel.

Don’t be alarmed when your friends desert you

Don’t be afraid when the dark clouds appear

Don’t forget God will never abandon you

God is real….no matter how you feel.

God may seem so distant

God may seem to turn his back on you

God may seem to be deaf to your cries

But all these, all these are untrue.

God is here, He knows everything about you

God is near, He knows your doubts and your fears

God is real, He knows what is best for you

God is real, no matter how you feel.